For him (confessions of a blogger)

i could explain why i've been thinking about him
i could make excuses
i could lie
i could pretend i dont feel this way


but
what would be the point?
and maybe it's bc im lonely, bc im avoiding Someone else, bc the Australian girls reminded me soo much of him
wait...
i said i wouldn't make excuses


and then Nylon uploaded this song by Adele & The XX which i love
and probably killed in one night

"the scars of your love

remind me of us

 they keep me thinking

 that we almost had it all"

and yes, i went through afew of his Facebook pics

listening to it

missing him

wanting him ....

wow -- confessions of a blogger

and now i cant stop thinking about him

really

for a while i thought i forgot about him

i haven't spoken to him since last i saw him

last month? no longer ago

last year?

i remember Andrea being like.. "yes, i love you two together"

i wonder what he thought about that

i wonder how he felt about me hesitating to kiss him

i wonder if he thinks about me

if he hates me

i wonder if we would have worked together

if thats something he wanted...though i highly doubt it

still...

its nice to think about

we would sit around talking about nothing ...

"i love your accent" "no, i love your accent"

we would drink wine

and picnic

we would go out with friends

you would make fun of how stupid i am

you would try to understand me

and teach me about silly things

and listen to what i say

no -- i will not cry over a fantasy

you would let me play with your hair

and sleep in your arms

and kiss my forehead

we would kiss

everything would be perfect

really

you're really good looking

and well, i like you

i do...