Friday, March 18, 2011

feels like i have nothing

i used to be really happy
i was fixing things

but then i got lazy and caught up in old memories
and ruined all my progress

and  really dont know what i need anymore

i dont.

i dyed my hair about a week ago
and today was the first day, after a while
 where i looked in the mirror and recognised myself

today i like it
though i cant wait to change it

i finally uploaded the photo's taken on my birthday
im so inlove with them :)
and thank you for the stockings you bought me andrea**
now we just need an occasion to wear them

i am excited to be on holiday
and for things to get better
to relax and watch series
and see friends

i love my friends

even the ones i have at varsity
(though dont get me wrong, i do still have fans....and shame, they're sweet
and no, im still not used to them)

maybe im just a little distressed about this adjustment i have to make
maybe im lazy
or lonely

maybe im trying to hard....
im not sure what i want

look how lovely her short hair looks andrea*

i have a purpose
and yet still feel purposeless
(euw, the word "purpose" is just disgusting)

maybe i just want to have fun

go out and meet people
or just have fun with people i know
or both

....goodness and talking about "fun"
rebecca black is....
no i will not hate on her on my blog
but F*CK
her song "friday" is something demented
and i'd tell you to listen to it but
it might ruin your life

you wont be the same again
you wont enjoy the phrase ... no im not going to say it


She did!! ...
kay now im just freaking out all over again

**deep breaths

i ended up making a CD for andrea
i needed to listen to something

and i've been playing it over and over
and i cant wait to play it in her kitchen
and to drink tea

hmmmm tea


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